Decisions, Moments, Fear and a Kitchen Island
I know this isn’t brand new news to anyone, but I’m definitely learning that life is made up of moments and the decisions we make in those moments. I have come to notice that we are constantly faced with decisions that make up the course of our life. We often get stuck thinking that the big defining moments of greatness define our life, but in reality those moments are just as fleeting as the little ones. One big decision to quit your job is done in the same amount of time it takes you to decide set your alarm for an earlier morning. The process leading up to that decision is what consumes your time, but the actual decision happens in a moment.
Big decision: “I’m going to quit my job”. Small decision: “I’m going to set my alarm earlier”. As I wrote that I laugh because the “bigger” decision actually took less time to type than the “smaller”. Do you get my point?
What I’m trying to say is that decisions need to be made moment-by-moment. As an over thinker in many things (ie it took me over 6 months to buy a kitchen island I knew I loved the moment I saw it… lol) I find that I am always weighing the pros, cons, benefits, risk, facts, opinions, and analysing the situation so that it results in no decision at all. I justify the process by saying it is necessary for me to be confident in my decisions. I tell myself that I need to be sure… that my confidence in the decision is wisdom in action. ***Enter Holy Spirit***… “Oh, is that what wisdom looks like?” the grace filled and truth filled questions follow
--> “what are you afraid of?”
--> “Why is this taking so long?”
--> “Can you be confident in me? In my leading? In my truth?”
--> Trust me
Fear. The Holy Spirit highlights fear in me. Our fear weighs in on our decision making process. Fear says if you buy that island that you like and can afford right now, you may be missing out on a different island that works better and makes your life look more put together and offers ease to your daily activities”. Fear goes deeper and says, “This is the wrong choice”. Fear then hits where it hurts and says “You make wrong choices” and fear makes me believe that “I am wrong”. It disables me in my confidence, in my sound mind, in my God given gifts and abilities. Fear inserts doubt and lies that prevents me from moving forward.
Does this seem a little dramatic? Is it too much to analyse fear when standing in Ikea looking at a perfectly good kitchen island? Absolutely not. These are the exact moments I am talking about that make up our life. In that moment I have a decision to make and it isn’t about the island. The decision is what and who am I going to listen to? Am I going to listen to fear, a tool used by the enemy to slow me down and disable me, or am I going to listen to truth, the tool used by God to empower me and move me forward?
Honestly, I don’t think God cares if I buy the island or not. I don’t think he cares if its perfect for my space, or matches my colours and goes with the flow of my home. He has given me good taste (in my opinion lol), a mind to use to make decisions, and free will to choose what I like… in fact he has created me to have these specific and special desires/wants/needs. What I think he cares about is that I am bound in fear and that he wants me to be free from that. He wants me to walk up to the kitchen island and be like “wow what a beautiful island, I’m going to buy it!” This statement expresses confidence that if it is the “wrong” island it won’t really matter. This statement expresses hope that God will use this (or any) island to stabilize a cup of tea while one of my friends tells me about the pain of losing her mother. This statement expresses that fear of mistakes, wrong decisions, or other people’s opinion doesn’t matter. It expresses freedom from fear… freedom from doubt… freedom from the lies of the enemy.
Freedom into confidence in God.
Tell me… what is your deicision making process? What or who are you listening to? Does your pro and con list reek of fear or is it soaked in a pleasing perfume of trust in God?
Reply below, email me, or call me to let me know what you think about fear and how it influences the course of your life.
In truth and love,